Tuesday, 21 April 2015

How to build confidence

My self-esteem was once so low that my boyfriends mum gave me a book on how to build my confidence. Now, it wasn't the book that kicked me out of that frame of mind, it was someone acknowledging that I needed to do something about it. Which was something I just couldn't see myself. 

I have always been a confident person. I am happy and bubbly most of the time and usually I find it easy to bounce back and get on with things. For some reason this particular time I felt it was so difficult to over-come what I was going through. 

I will be forever grateful to Corrie for her help and support during that time of my life. There are so many things that can happen to you that can knock your confidence. For me, it was moving away from home to be with Gary. Not that the decision to move in with him was what knocked my confidence, I will never regret moving to be with him as our relationship wouldn't be what it is today. Moving away from home to a new place where I had no friends, I had no job and nothing was mine. It felt strange. So different from being at university where I went home every term and was surrounded by friends. 

Maybe it was acknowledging that I now had to make grown-up decisions, or maybe I was just homesick, I do not know. Here I felt quite isolated and lonely. I quickly fell into the darkness of low self-esteem and that's what caused arguments. That's when Corrie came to me and handed me the book. I knew then that I needed to get my life back. I made a choice and I needed to make it work for me, instead of feeling sorry for myself. 

I am not going to say it was easy, because it wasn't. I lost touch with some of the girls I use to call 'friends' after realising what they were really like. But I have kept in-touch with the important people in my life. I have a wonderful family both in Birmingham and here in Berkshire. 

I eventually found a job which kick-started my progressing career and I have made some wonderful friends here as well. Me and Gary have built such a wonderful life for ourselves. We have our own home and things are going from strength to strength.

I am not telling you this because I want to rub it in that my life has gotten better, I am trying to tell you that it will get better. You have to want to do something about it. Those changes do not happen over-night! It takes time, work and positivity. Try and surround yourself with positive people. People you know you can turn to for support. And most of all know who your friends are because you need people you can count on, not people who knock you down. 

I hope this post offers you some enlightenment, and you find your confidence again!

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